To be centered is the mantra. 

To remember to be centered – every time, each time.

And that is the objective of this sitting – to practice, to remember.

To be centered requires practice.

To remember is to be conscious.

Consciously centered.

Consciously to remember to be centered.

 

And of course you can take the help – whatever help.

And so use the breathing, it is the closest to yourself.  If you observe you will see.

When you bring your attention to the breath, you get a sense of self.  It is very close.

 

It is not easy to do it with thought although that is more advanced, the next step, when you can manage it even with thought.  When observing the thought you get a sense of being, a sense of self.  And that is what we mean by being present.  To have a sense of being is to be present.  This is not experienced normally.  It has a special flavour – let’s put it this way.  And that is also meant awake to yourself.

 

Therefore the first priority is to remember to be centered.  This is the philosophy – then how you go about it is the practice, the method – again and again.  It does not matter how long.  You have decided, that is where you have to reach.  Then you go about doing it.  Not to lose hope so easily.  It is there.  All it requires is your conscious commitment.  It requires a certain maturity.  You know it is there.  You have known people who have had it, who have it.  It is only a matter of time, practice and commitment.  Of course not to mention the sangha, the environment, the atmosphere, the association of one who is awake: Buddham sharanam gachchhami – refuge in the awakened one.

 

So to be centered… to be centered is to be free.  It does not mean one would not encounter the unpleasant.  That may be in the nature of things, because of the environment.  There is the outer environment, there is the inner environment.  There is the outer world, there is the inner world: your emotions, your feelings, all kinds of things in your subconscious, they are your inner world, inner environment.  Your moods, your frustrations, and the states you pass through. Subjective world.  So also the outer world, the objective world.  Subjective – Objective.

 

In all this you try to arrange yourself for the pleasant.  Some joy, some pleasure, some freedom.  Weaving back and forth, to and fro through the two worlds, hopefully you weave from one pleasantry to the next.  It is a hit and miss thing.  Sometimes you hit it right and sometimes you miss it altogether.  Seems like all a game of chance.  You have expectations.  Sometimes it is fulfilled and you are happy – most times the unexpected happens.  Then whatever the reaction.

 

But through all this the priority is to be centered.  Emotions, reactions may follow because of the outside, as a natural reaction to the outside, the objective world, the objective environment.  This is the game: the inner reacting to the outer depending on what state one is in. In an emotional state one reacts emotionally, for example.  And you may be swept off your feet.  Confusions, delusions all follow.  You have lost the center.  You cry in pain.  It is all part of the game.  One is helpless.  So the priority to remember is to be centered; to remember even in those trying moments – first priority.  Center yourself in yourself.  From there you can watch and observe and understand.  To understand is to transcend, to master.  Again it is a process.  It is a journey.  Beautiful.  There is everything.  And when one starts to understand and see in this way, then it is a wonderful journey – in spite of the tears.

 

We all have wept in our own times.

 

So center – and so when we sit here, this is what we practice, again and again.  It may seem banal and mundane to begin with, but if we understand its importance then we will be so inspired.  It will be all worth it.  And when one awakens to oneself, a force awakens in you.  It opens you out to wonderful things.  What was once mysterious becomes an everyday normal experience. 

 

Be playful and joyful that you have taken to the journey.  Be self-inspired.  Be a master unto yourself.  Remember to be centered.  And when you are centered you can open doors and windows to yourself that are now closed.  So to be centered is the first priority – to become conscious of being present.

 

And to help you to be centered breath is most important.  By modifying the breath you can modify your state.  And the breathing helps you to come to a stop in yourself – centered.  Maybe for a moment you will find yourself centered and then it is gone – practice will prolong that moment.  It will become a way of life.  When you are centered you become conscious of the inner world.  You become conscious of being present, of a special presence.  It is then that meditation begins.  It is then that meditation becomes the whole of your life: your rest and your motion, your contemplation and your action. 

 

And when you are centered you will become aware of the silence of yourself – even so in all the noise and clamour of the outside.  Deep silence.  And you find it present in all things, everywhere – spreading.  Everywhere with no limits; embracing each and everything, each and everyone.  So to be centered.  To remind oneself again and again to be centered.  Not only out here, but out there, and every where – every time to remember.  When you are speaking and when you are listening.

 

To be able to be aware of thoughts, of emotions as they come up and go while you yet remain centered in yourself; to be able to stand behind your emotions, your reactions, your passions your thoughts and be centered in yourself.  To be able to experience all the disturbances within oneself and yet be able to be centered rather than losing oneself to the disturbance. Then from there you can understand the reasons for the disturbance, objectively.

 

Usually the first impulse is to be carried away in response or in reaction: can the first impulse be to center.  Can one remember?  Behind the response or the reaction you will find Silence.  You will find freedom.  You will find yourself to be vast as the ocean.  Then you can ride the storm or let it go – you are the master.  Then you open yourself to great power, tremendous power.  At that time all the power in the universe is with you, for you and the universe are one. 

 

So to be centered is the first priority, the first impulse, and therefore to be conscious of your breath.  When you become conscious of your breath a moment will come that you become conscious of yourself.  If you think about it you will find that during the day you are rarely conscious of your breath.  You are more conscious of what the other is doing and what the other is not doing.  For you take your breath for granted.  The reason why you take the breath for granted, or anything for granted, is because you feel that it is always going to be with you.  You were born with the breath.  It is an accepted fact.  You had it ever since you are aware of yourself.  So it stays.  But if you were afraid and frightened that it would leave you one day maybe you would be more conscious of it.  It is always the case.  When you feel you are going to lose something you are more conscious of that thing; it bothers you more.

 

Breath is there, it has been there, it will be there: why worry about it.  Yeah, don’t worry about the breath, be conscious of it.  You will see if you have a friend who always follows you around, is always with you, after a while you just take it for granted that the friend is always going to be there.  And you decide for the friend without the friend being asked and whatever – you just take the friend for granted.  It is only when the friend one day decides to assert himself or herself or threatens to depart, it’s only then that you become more conscious of the friend.  At least for a while! (Laughing) That’s life.  So the friend has to continue to remind you, ‘I’m leaving’!  Then for a while again you are more aware of your friend, more conscious of his or her needs.  (Laughing)

 

And breath is such a friend; it has been with you ever since you remember; you were born with it.  You don’t need to remember, you don’t need to be conscious – it is there.  And yet it has a secret.  If you become conscious of your breath – the more conscious you become of your breath, the more conscious you become of your self.  Therefore they say breath is life.  If breath is gone, you are gone. (Laughing)

 

In India when someone passes away they say his breath has left him.  So the friend left him.  So if we can remember that this friend may depart one day, I think we will pay more attention.  So we talk of being attentive to the breath.  Again and again I remind you.  Bring your attention to the breath.  That is what is meant by being centered. Attention to the breath, then from there to yourself.  Sense of being, sense of self.

 

When you bring your attention to the breath, a moment comes when it reaches to a point of stop.  When the breath stops then there is a very strong sense of self.  That stop is the door to your self, to your awakening: to the awakening of a process and a transformation that has no end – A new way of living.  The only thing about the breath is that it has no need of itself, otherwise you see friends usually tend to play games. When they want your attention they will throw a tantrum, ‘I am leaving’ and you have to pay attention.  Breath never does that, it only leaves once – and then it is all over. (Laughing)  With friends it is they leave and come back and they leave and come back, but with the breath it never says in between, ‘I’m going to leave’.  When it does leave it leaves permanent – full stop.  Breath is such a friend.  Wish it would remind one more often, then one would be paying more attention to the breath. But then the Guru does that and keeps reminding you for your sake.

 

And the more you become conscious of yourself, the breath starts to move in a different way.  Then you enter the realm of the mysterious.  You start to see what was before invisible.

 

It is your first priority: to be centered.  Then the sun comes out.  Then the clouds are no more.  Then you have a big smile on your face – the smile of the Buddha, the smile of Shiva.  And you are at peace.  Then the disciples arrive and for a moment you lose your peace, (Laughing) and the clouds appear once again. (Laughing) Different types of clouds.  Then you have to do it all over again – (Still laughing) this time for them.  The sun has disappeared again!!

 

So be conscious of your breath.  Through being conscious of the breath arrive at being conscious of yourself.  Sense of self, sense of being.  And of course you can modify the breathing – that helps you to be conscious of the breath more effectively and therefore more effectively to be conscious of yourself.

 

And through modifying your breathing you can modify your state of mind.  The breath is always with you, you can always use it.  Anytime, everytime.   And through the breath to be centered in yourself. 

 

(explanation in Hindi to Benedict)

 

 

Panchmadhi

8 February 2002